So.. The start of the.. err.. "story of my life" of some kind. Aka where it all started.. (the logic is undeniable)
Actually.. It all started with the smallest thing. Crow (I repeat, Crow = my brother) bought a second controler for his xbox. Such tiny thing as my brother saying "Hey, you know what? I bought another controler for my xbox. Wanna play some Halo?" After that I and my brother started getting really close. Over.. a week I think.. We played through all the Halo games campaign. And once we were done with that, we started playing some Halo 3 matchmaking. This is where I started to get to know Crow's xbox live friends. Or well.. No.. I didn't get to know them, but I.. heard them through the TV. The first person I actually talked to.. was John. I remember the ver first thing he said to me. Which wasn't actually to me but to Crow, but however. "I bet your sister's hot he said". That pissed Crow off so bad. And well, my answer to that was "Of course I am". After that, I remember talking to John once, helping him with this girl.. Vicky. he told me how he'd liked her for quite a while, how they were really good friends and that he didn't know what she thought about him cuz sometimes she seemed to like him but another time she seemed to hate him. I also got some time to just casually talk to him once during a game I remember. And I also remember how I really, really couldn't talk and play at the same time at that time.
However.. I came with the idea that I and Crow would buy a vision cam, aka a webcam for the xbox. Which we ended up doing.. I remember this was on a friday, that we bought it. With the camera came a headset and a month with free xbox live gold membership. And there... I made my own xbox live account, named Selene Crow. (Crow is actually just a surname for mine and my brother's online character alias.. thingys. But also his online nickname.) But the xbox wqas still Crow's, located in his room, so I didn't actually get to play that much, But yeah.. This friday, when we bought the camera and I could actually talk to people for the same time.. That's when things started to happen. I don't remember anything of what games we played or what was said.. But what I remember is that night, when I went to sleep and.. I just couldn't stop crying. I couldn't stop thinking about John. it was something I had never felt before. It was like I had fallen in love, after one day. And that's actually what happened. No matter how damn strange that sounds. I tried to deny it, because I.. didn't want it. I've always thought love comes through friendshop so then how the hell could I be in love without even knowing him? And also, he obviously liked someone else (Vicky) so I stood no change. But well.. That's what happened. I kept thinking about him, constantly, and I was playing with him every now and then, when he joined Crows games. Now I also started to get to know "An Evil Pudding", who I would eventually learn was the person by the name Andy. He and John were in the same school, the same year, they were best friends and couldn't be separated. At this time though, I just found Andy really annoying. But yeah..
6 days after this friday, aka the next thursday, I had some time alone at Crows xbox. I had an ivite from.. Can't remember if it was from Andy of Mark, another guy, but however. The two of them was in the game. I even remember what map it was on and everything... But however. I remember Andy just randomly, all of a sudden saying "Hey Selene.. John fancies you." All I answered to that was some kind of bored "okay?". My heart started beating when Andy said that and I was all like.. Omg! I didn't dare to trust him though and tried not to think about it. I mean.. It was just too good to be true, that John would actually like me. Later the same night I was talking to John and he asked if I would get any time alone at the xbox soon. Which I would, cuz Crow got home real late at fridays. So, when the friday came.. I first had about 40 minutes alone with John. Then later the same night I got to use the xbox another hour while Crow was watching Stargate. Nearly constantly during this hour, John was rambling about things such as that he talks to others but he never talks himself. Saying things that showed he wanted to say something.. but couldn't. When there was like.. 5 minutes till I had to go he said it though. "I kind of like you".
That's where I started going out with John. at the 23d of may. (I'm probably never gonna forget that date cuz I wrote it everywhere for a time)
End of chapter 1. (or something like that) To be continued tomorrow.
(omgwtfbbq I used an emoticon) And then I couldn't fall asleep yesterday.. I think I was awake till about 3 or something. And then, once I fell asleep I had all these weird dreams. I've been dreaming every night for nearly a week now.. I don't usually dream, but when I do they always come continuous. And the thing is.. When I dream, it's like I only get about.. 30% maybe, of the sleep I actually get. So I'm real tired at the moment. And a weird thing about this is that I've had dreams with people I actually know in them. Victor, a friend of mine named Linda, some people from school, Andy, John.. And I never -and I mean never - have dreams about "real" people. My dreams are usually just weird, and I'm me but not me.. And the people around me can be someone I know, but they arn't actually them.. Gah, dunno how to explain. It's weird, however.
