It's actually nearly christmas.. Idunno if that's good or not? Or well it's good, I guess...
I only wrote 2 posts yesterday, even if I'm at home and have got a computer at hand.. That must've been the first time ever, haha. I didn't do much yesterday but still I kind of did, I was overly social yesterday. I was talking to Cheggs over msn like all day, I talked to Linda on the phone altogether about 1½ hours and it looks like I'm going with her over New Year anyways. I found out it was just her and (her)Victor and possibly like 2 of his friends and maybe a girl that I know as well so it's no big deal really. i thought he would have a party or something but I was wrong. And even if people drink a little I guess I can stand that. So now I'm just waiting for my mom to make up her mind if I can go or not. And then Victor rang me and we talked for nearly 2 hours as well. Hearing his voice made me realize how much I actually miss him, even though when we talked it was only a day sence we saw each others the last time... But still. I would after all not mind never being without him. And well then I... Played some Fallout 3 and was being social with my family. Then today I've been talking to Cheggs as usual, and Andy as well... And I helped my mom making cookies (om nom nom) and later on I'm gonna help her wrap presents. Uhm.. Yep.. There isn't actually much happening at all, and I'm not feeling anything special either... It's kinda nice actually. It's not only as if I'm having a holiday from school but from feelings as well. I'm somehow all of a sudden able to let things go for a while.

Oh and I had this really weird nightmare tonight... I don't remember much, as usual, but it was me and some other people and we were being chased throughout all of the dream.. And then somewhere in the end I got cought and it appeared that the people chasing me were friends of my stepdad and one of them tried to rape me and then it ended with them getting sniped in the head... Very odd. And I realized that I actually like nightmares.. Or at least sometimes. Cuz I enjoy danger, I love action and wouldn't mind more of that happening in my life (i know there's already alot happening but I want other things then emotional problems, lol), but in a dream.. it feels real, but it doesnt really matter if you die or whatever cuz it's not actually on real. And I love that. At the same time as I don't like nightmares cuz they're kinda.. scary. But you know.. Ah geez, I so wouldn't mind someething big happening that made me have to like.. Run away to survive or whatever. it would be quite cool. And I really shouldn't think like that, huh?