I seem to have gotten alot closer to Adam aka Honey lately, and earlier today I realized that he's the "new Darling". Not meaning he's replaced Andy, but meaning that at the moment we seem to be as close as Darling and I used to be. Then, just.. an hour and a half ago or something, Adam asked me to go on the xbox and play halo with him, so I did, and I also ended up playing with and talking to Darling. And as all of us were tired since it's getting late and everything it ended up with me and Darling going hyper and stuff, and it just very much reminded me of what we used to be like. He used to be the closest friend I'd ever had. Then he randomly started talking about someone named Emma, and then and there I realized what's happened. Everything cleared up. I asked him "who's Emma?" and his first answer was "don't you know?" and then I reaized. The thing is, Andy's been acting.. different lately. And he seems to be starting to be with friends more and blabla. (He even said today that he's concidering selling his xbox cuz it's taking up too much of his life) And the simple answer was the fact that he's got a girlfriend. At first I just "meh:ed" at it. Then I realized I didn't feel what I thought I would. Then it all cleared up. And.. Yer.. He's changed a bit, and we've drifted apart like hell. But I guess that all happens easily when you don't actually see each other. I've got another friend, nickname Kuwde, who I'm really good friend with at some points and talk to alot but then we don't talk for like 6 months, and it's been like that for.. I'd guess 4 years now.
However, the main points of my rambling is 1: the fact that I didn't even know Andy had a girlfriend, and I didn't find out till it slipped out. I won't deny the fact that it hurts a tiny bit, that I didn't find out. and 2: is something completely different, but anyways. It was me, Andy and Adam playing. Andy and I were all hyper and rambling and stuff, Adam was more or less quiet and didn't seem quite as amused as me and Andy. And.. Bah, i don't even know where I'm going. I'm emotionally unstable at the moment and dunno wtf's going on with anything. However, I was worried something was wrong and Adam's connection was horrible so he kept getting lagged out and eventually he left and wrote to me on msn saying this; im going to go now sweetie, sorry major tiredness, plus i dont really feel very well =( ly sweetie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx *hug*
It just made me feel uncomfortable somehow, and I'm afraid something's wrong and blabla. See what I was on about? Adam's the new Daring, equal I'm gonna worry about everything. Nah but... I know I haven't said much about it, since I haven't been writing much the last days, but we've been talking alot and just gotten very much closer and I just love it. He's a great guy. I dunno what more to say. It's past 2 in the morning, and it might be summer hoidays now but I should be asleep. And friends feeling bad + unexpected news + being away from Victor fucks up my emotions and my mind. My mood's so weird right now. Oh and 3: Note the fact that I'm saying Andy, not Darling. And I didn't even realize I did till I read it through...
Night/Morning people, I'll give you a more proper post tomorrow xx
